A Nigerian big and bold lady, Oluwaremilekun Fatolu took to social media to narrate her experence while been fat and the nightmare she suffers because of her size
She called names imagined and even bullied but she came out a winner and says she is telling her story to encourage anyone going through what she went through.
My name is Oluwaremilekun Fatolu, but popularly known as Auntie Remi, some call me OROBO. hmmm…
Sounds funny right?
Its not been an easy journey getting to where I am today especially mentally.
Being addressed by such names. As orobo, apapu and iya apati caused a lot of damage to my life! I however thank God I fought thru.
I was born early 90’s.Had my junior secondary school in asaba where I was born, and my senior secondary school in lagos (3 different schools) hmmm, I’m sure you are wondering why. I wasn’t a dull young girl, I was very very intelligent! Yes, like most people, I never liked mathematics, but I was the best in English! I was very good communicating and interacting with people even at my age then.
My travails started when I was in primary 6 as I was growing rapidly.
note that my growth in size wasn’t due to excess food intake but I opine that it appears God created me that way.
I couldn’t blame him, neither could I blame my parents for having me.
But then, sadness began.
I would go to school every morning like everyone else to learn the rudiments of becoming a better person in all ways but would be treated like an outcast due to my size.
I was the biggest person in my class. I had no friends. Probably all my colleagues felt I was going to bully them or something and even called me a bully . I just discovered to my innocent surprise that these kids were just not friendly towards me.
They found it so easy to insult me and call me all sorts of names. As a result of this treatment, I started changing. I would consider myself nice natured ordinarily, but something inside me decided that this congregation did not deserve to see the better me. My mum didn’t notice the change at first but after sometime she found something amiss. I started losing interest in my studies, I was no longer enjoying school. All I wished for was to get out of that school and proceed to a higher class. My hope was that respite would come when I find other girls of my size.
hmmmm , if only I knew better. I only discovered that my travails in primary school represented only a tip of the iceberg.
I wrote my Common entrance exams, passed, got into junior secondary school and at the very beginning of secondary school, things took a worse turn. Every single corner of the school I walked into, I found one group or the other staring at me, whispering inaudible words to themselves, laughing so loud and pointing their fingers at me. Teachers were no better as when I walked into the staff room I was addressed by all kinds of insulting ibo names. Apa akpu (bag of akpu), Apa rice (bag of rice) and so on.
I found solace in no one. I found no one to talk to or play with. There were times in the morning when I woke up and remembered I was going to school and I would break down because I didn’t feel loved, because I was scared . I didn’t want to be insulted, I didn’t feel I deserved that as my size wasn’t self inflicted. At a point I would lie I was sick just to avoid school. I struggled through junior secondary school after which I made it clear that I wasn’t going to school anymore. I couldn’t attend birthdays or anything as I already had it in mind that I would to be mocked.
Luckily, my elder brother came and took me to lagos. I thought that the change of environment would make things completely different. How wrong I was.
To my surprise, it went from bad to worse. So I started rejecting one school after another due to how I was treated. I moved from the first to the second and from the second to the third. I struggled and I finished from the third school, it wasn’t easy, hmmmm…..
I left secondary school and was coming of age then the relationship aspect came. No guy wanted to date a fat gurl. Maybe they were scared to approach me, or they weren’t sure they could handle me, either way, I was alone again.
Then I found one, or should I say he found me. I tot I could be happy again till one faithful weekend I paid a surprise visit to my boyfriend and on getting to his door I overheard him telling his friends about how his time with me has been so far. He was saying he was whiling away time with me, that he can’t even take me out as I’m too huge. Oh God it felt as if the world was coming to an end!
That relationship ended after that and many more happened and it had to do with my size directly and indirectly after which I came across God sent friends, Olabisi ,Pelumi and Ibidayo Akeredolu ale May his soul Rest In peace.
They helped me with my fight of self realization. They taught me how to look smart, how to be confident, how to face a crowd, how to hold my head up high even when people mocked me. They taught me how to laugh over mockery.
Soon after, I traveled back to Asaba where I met some of my old friends who are also plus size. Some couldn’t make it through secondary school. Some were pregnant without even knowing who was responsible. Some were married, married out of shame.
They got married simply because they felt if they stayed longer at home they may grow even bigger and would be totally out of the relationship market entirely. They weren’t shown love and care.
I’m certain I’m not the only one who has passed through these travails. Others have, but like a friend of mine would say “you can never generalize people. Our choices are different” I chose to fight through. There are however still many more like me out there urgently in need of help, care, understanding and love.
I am ready to help cos I was also helped.
My advice to parents is to watch their children closely, show them love, give them attention no matter what age they are at. Not only babies need attention!
And guys! I mean fans of plus size ladies, don’t be scared or shy approaching us if you’re attracted. And to all the plus size ladies reading this, God created us for a special reason, that is why we are unique and absolutely different. Learn from my story, adjust your mindset as in my case for example, having that issue on my mind at a very tender age nearly destroyed me. It nearly stopped me from socialising, it almost stopped me from being educated. Fight whatever challenge facing you and with the help of God you will overcome it. I did!
Today i hold my head up high everywhere i go. Im drop dead gorgeous and i know it. I’m now a bonafide make up artiste, a skit maker, a content creator and a plus size model on my way to sure success. My passion? Making people look beautiful, especially plus sized women. my little way of contributing to uplifting my constituency..